From Dust to Life
A star is born in the depths of space from nothing more than clouds of gas and dust drawn together by once inexplicable forces. From such humble beginnings did our own star form billions of years ago. The same star that provides warmth on a cold day, life to everything and everyone, once began as no more than dust floating in the vastness of the cosmos.
It is my belief that truly spectacular friendships are born the same way. From the dust that my life has become, a star now burns where once there was only darkness and shadows. Just as unexplainable as star formation once was, so too are the events that have led to this friendship. I can only shake my head with amusement and awe anytime I find myself musing on the events that led me to this friend.
Both the CFS and MCS have brought about severe social isolation. Very few people knew of my existence and even fewer people cared. I had known of a desperate longing for someone who would be able to understand my crazy world, or at least understood enough and wanted to know more, but I had long since given up almost all hope of finding such a person. Jeremy is extremely caring and companionable, yet I needed someone outside this tent who would hear me when I spoke of everything in life, not only the things that have some normality to them.
Over time, all but one of my friends I had managed to retain or slowly make over the last few years began to drift away one by one. Our worlds are too different most times. They have to navigate work and the normalcy of life, while I live in a tent and struggle with the rigors of being chronically ill. I do not blame them, even I am wholly confused by my life sometimes and find it almost impossible to believe, let alone understand it.
Just as my oldest friend was quietly departing without a word of goodbye, my newest friend was practically throwing me a welcoming party though we had only just met.
Now I sit here after an amazing day filled with laughter such as I have not seen in years and tears that have needed just the right person to shed them at last. And still I shake my head in amazement at the twists of fate life can hold, while also hardly daring to believe this is real.
This entry was posted on October 3, 2009 by Cat. It was filed under dreams, ramblings and was tagged with cfs, chronic fatigue syndrom, friendship, mcs, multiple chemical sensitivity, social isolation.