I’ve been down and out of life for the last couple of months, mostly because Tashi has been waking us up multiple times a night since mid-February. She’s a wonderful cat in all other ways, but sadly she has trouble with being afraid of things in our home environment which we have zero control over.
The main trigger for her nightly wake-ups seems to be our neighbor’s voice coming in through our windows at all hours of the night. I don’t blame the neighbor, she works until midnight and we knew that before moving in. Everything is at a normal speaking volume, she’s just awake much of the night. We’ve worked far too many lousy jobs that require that sort of shift to complain about someone else who’s working that shift and simply unwinding at night by chatting with their boyfriend.
And so we’ve found Tashi a new home. It’s a good home and she will be moving there at the end of this week. There are 3 other cats and a dog, along with some nice folks. A much bigger home, more windows for her, and most importantly – neighbors who’s windows are much further than 5 feet away.
I’ll be very sorry to see her go. I haven’t posted much about her here, but she’s been a real highlight in our lives these last 6 months. Were it not for this constant lack of sleep and what it’s done to our health (a full stop on our healing progress for CFS and some regression), it would be a great joy to keep her with us.
However it seems to have come down to staying tired and feeling useless in life or keeping a wonderful cat – oddly it was a hard choice. But then being tired and feeling useless is actually what most of life felt like since becoming ill in 2001 – it’s only recently begun to change at the end of last year so I’m not as familiar with what that feels like anymore.
What I do remember of December (2012) and January (2013) was a great deal of delight in feeling my energy coming up, actually being able to see and feel life returning to a more normal picture, and being happy that my existence isn’t dictated solely by feelings of Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Multiple Chemical Sensitives. Thankfully, I’m still seeing MCS improvements, even just yesterday going into a store (Costco) that we had to avoid in the past like the plague due to all the odors and such. Now it was just as I remembered it from when I went as a kid with my mom on shopping day – everything smelled just the same, not overwhelming or frightening. Life with MCS really is coming to a close and it’s both a brilliant and wonderful thing.
I know this can happen with CFS too and unfortunately its all too clear that right now that means as best of sleep as we can manage so our nervous systems can calm down instead of being jarred awake several times a night. Truly, Tashi is going to a great home with one of the worker’s at the cat sanctuary we adopted her from – actually the woman who helped us pick her out. The woman had always wanted Tashi, seemed a little sad to see her go, but had not wanted to make the commitment before. She’s had a change of mind now that she’s seen just how wonderful and loving Tashi is as a house cat – they’ll do well together I think.
Hopefully in a few weeks time Jeremy and I will be seeing more energy again. Neither of us can hardly wait for the adventures on our horizon and have lots of motivation to make them happen. Brighter days should be coming our way, even if they are a little more lonely without my dear Tashi.
Have you ever been to a nude beach? I went to my first one today!
Little Beach is part of the Makena State Park and known for being clothing optional, as well as it’s Sunday night drum parties. It’s a very nice little cove at the end of a quarter mile hike. The snorkeling wasn’t spectacular, however we saw some fish we’ve never seen before – including a small school of fish probably each the size of a large dog. As well, several sea turtles made the whole trip very worthwhile.
Yet, we didn’t go to Little Beach for the snorkeling – we went for the whales. Humpback whales migrate here each winter from December through April. According to my research, Little Beach would be just about the best place from shore to watch them passing by. Shortly after we arrived we were greeted with an amazing site. Two adult humpback whales only a few hundred feet off the shore, swimming along and doing their own thing. Though we didn’t see much more than their back spines each time they came to the surface, it was a fantastic site that brought tears to my eyes.
I mean, how fantastic is it to have seen something like that so close in the wild?
I wasn’t on a boat with dozens of other tourists or some other modern means to be out on the water with them. No, I was just standing on the shore of a beach I’d hiked out to and seeing them as I am, a human on land, and as they are, majestic beauty in the ocean. Absolutely one of the most amazing things I’ve seen in my life.
This isn’t the first time I’ve seen whales, not even here on Maui – just something about them being so close I felt like I could nearly touch them… wonderful.
Have you ever wondered what whale songs are like in the wild?
Sometimes when you snorkel here during the winter you can hear them signing to each other underwater. This is the second time I’ve been lucky to hear them. Today they were loud enough to be easily heard, even over the white noise of the choppy waves we were snorkeling in. It was very magical, especially the times when we’d find a turtle to swim with. Whales whistling and calling to one another, following a sea turtle as it wandered the reef, scores of brightly colored fish swimming below us – I’ll always remember this.
I found myself at one point being struck by how diametrically different my life is now compared to March in Washington while living in a tent. Almost every year the last snow of the season would be sometime in the next two weeks. We’d be completely and totally exhausted from surviving another freezing and snowy winter only to look forward to a ridiculous amount of rain for the next two months, praying this summer would be warm and sunny. Often times it would be a wet summer too with nary a good, hot day to burn off winter’s chill before turning into Autumn and starting the cycle all over.
Instead, here I was snorkeling nude in the ocean, warm sunshine on my backside, while swimming with whales and turtles!
If life can change so dramatically for me in such a short period of time, just think of what else I can do. I am getting healthy again, there is no doubt about that, and sometimes like today I can really feel just how possible it is to change my situation for the better. It has taken an enormous amount of hard work and tenacity, but just look at where I am now!
I used to feel like I could inspire others to follow their dreams, grow as individuals, and reach places they thought were too distant – but sadly, I couldn’t do that for myself. Now I look at how life has changed me…I can be my own inspiration and reach my own dreams.
If I were to be able to speak to the illness that has stolen so many years of my life, I would have to quote one of my favorite movies – “Through dangers untold and hardships unnumbered, I have fought my way here to the castle beyond the Goblin City to take back the (life) that you have stolen, for my will is as strong as yours, and my kingdom as great — You have no power over me.”
It seems I have finally accomplished another dream today. For the last year I have wanted to open my own etsy store just as Jeremy had done for his steampunk jewelry business. I’ve seen him excitedly checking his email and finding that he’s sold something, it looked like a lot of fun! Problem was, I didn’t know what I wanted to sell…
Then last March I bought a nice DSLR camera and started taking pictures. It seemed pretty obvious what type of etsy store I would be opening up, it was now just a matter of time. In less than a week we found out had to move out of our apartment and the rental search began. As mentioned in previous posts, life with moderate MCS can be difficult – having to find safe housing that didn’t make us ill only made this more so.
As the months went by and we still were unsuccessful at our rental search, my ability for photography greatly declined as every bit of energy went into finding us a safe place to live. I would take my camera out for a trip perhaps once or twice a month, but anything more was beyond my physical abilities.
Then we moved! This is a wonderful apartment we have lived in these past 3 months and I often find myself thinking about how much I love it here. My energy came up a bit and again I began my day dreams of an etsy store of my own.
My last post told of winning a prize in a photography contest, it was the first step I took towards my store. Before preparing that photo for the contest, I still hadn’t readied a single photograph for printing. Many show how much I have left to learn about controlling my camera and setting up the shot – which means most photos need a lot of post processing work in Lightroom. However I didn’t let this deter me from my goal of starting up a store, just means I have opened it with less photographs than I had originally planned.
Which brings me to my grand opening of UNTAMED Photography! 😀
I hope to add to my store over the next few weeks and am very happy to have finally gotten through the steep learning curve to finish opening today. I hope you all enjoy the couple of pictures I have put up there already and I will be writing about new ones as they are listed.
Yesterday was a small, but enjoyable adventure at the Maui County Fair. When I saw the tents and rides last year I remember thinking – hmm, maybe next year… turns out it was! While not a very big fair, nor a very interesting one, it did hold one thing no other fair had for me in the past – a photo contest I had entered.
I found out about the contest four weeks before the deadline for entry. After our arduous rental search, my photography had found itself pushed to the wayside these last few months and so I was unsure I even had a photo to submit to the contest. Luckily I had a couple promising shots taken earlier this year and so starting editing from scratch with learning how to use Adobe Lightroom, I began my journey.
There were many problems which cropped up over the next few weeks, some no doubt due to my inexperience with photo editing and matting, but many due to the printshop themselves – leading me to resolve never to use them again. In the end, I had two submissions ready for the contest and entered them on in the ‘open’ division on the last possible day; one for the color category and one in the black and white. All along I kept telling myself and others that I was only entering them so I could see them hanging finished on the wall at the fair – not to win. No, that would be silly to enter to win a prize since I’d only just picked up photography again, it’s my first contest, heck – it’s even the first 2 pictures I have finished printed and matted in over 15 years!
Still… there was this small hope whispering to me that it would like to win a place in the winners circle.
It was a small local fair and I was a bit disappointed they didn’t even have an animal display since there is a lot of ranching and farming on the island. There were the usual rides and greasy fried foods, we walked right past these. Next there was a large tent with a cheerleading exhibition of the high school and younger girls. Past this was two more large tents which held many commercial vendors selling everything from car insurance to coffee. Looking around, there didn’t seem to be much else to the fair… but where was the photo competition?
Finally we spotted where they had set up the exhibits which received judging and headed to the only solid building in the area. Inside we found vegetables, bonsai trees, various handi-crafts, orchids, and finally I noticed the photos lining the far wall. Apparently we started at the end of the display and I wasn’t too surprised to see my color photo tucked in with all the others. Under the florescent lights, high heat and humidity for the orchids, and the matting/printing troubles I’d had – frankly it only looked ok, nothing special.
We kept looking along the wall and got to the section where they had hung the winners for the expert level entries. It was about this time I began wondering if I’d missed seeing my black and white picture in with all the others – I had actually missed the color one at first so it was a good possibility. Still… maybe I would wait and see if it was hung up elsewhere, there did seem to be another group of photos on display without prize ribbons past all the winners.
Then my eyes drifted along the wall of their own accord and caught sight of a familiar looking photo – with a ribbon by it. I quickly grabbed Jeremy’s sleeve, tugging him to come with me past the expert color winners, straight to the ‘open’ division black and white winners where my photo now hung with a 3rd place ribbon!
There was an older Asian couple who were walking past just as I arrived at my photo. Looking at the gentleman, I happily exclaimed that it was my photo, right there, which won 3rd place!! He nodded and hesitantly smiled at me, so I kept up my happy exclamations until his wife caught up with us, nodded at me and said congratulations, then hurried him past us to the safer expert winner’s area. With nobody else around to brag to, I had Jeremy take my picture to remember the moment. It took a couple tries before I lost yet another goofy grin, but here is me and my 3rd place winner – “Windswept Dryad.”
After viewing the other exhibits, like the monstera and dragon fruit, we decided to be done with the fair and instead go on a small road adventure up Ioa Valley for the first time. We walked around a little at the first park we came to, opting to save the state park for another trip. All in all, it was a fun day out.
**Update! I’ve just gotten home from picking up my contest entries. Imagine my surprise when unwrapping them and finding an envelope with them that says, “Maui Camera Club congratulates you! 3rd place” and $30 tucked inside. Woo! Amazing! Even better for having had zero clue there was prize money. Definitely doing a happy dance today! 😀
Monstera fruit and leaves:
Dragon fruit still on cactus branch:
“Windswept Dryad” and ribbon:
When you are open to life, you never know what adventure might lie around the corner. Today saw us getting paid for the first time in 10 years by helping our landlady and neighbor, GiGi. She runs a designer cake business at home and when we popped by to see if a package was delivered for us in the mail this morning, we were recruited to help her in the kitchen!
First we helped prepare some locally grown lilikoi (passion fruit) which I think was to be turned into a spread for cake topping. Next GiGi was talking about the strawberries she would be using for various parts of the cake – until she noticed nearly the whole carton was moldy.
Quickly Jeremy and I are off to the local market to buy new strawberries, these ones also locally grown and much fresher looking than the moldy ones bought yesterday from the chain grocery store. Here’s where we received our first paycheck in a decade – $10 to help fill the gas tank! We were also given a large quantity of fruits (bananas, grapefruit, star fruit) which are always appreciated since fruit is far too pricey to buy from even the farmer’s markets we frequent for our produce.
As we left the market laden with strawberries from our successfully completed mission, I couldn’t help but feel like we had just finished a Detour task on The Amazing Race. “You must fill the gas tank and return with 6 cartons of fresh strawberries before you may continue with the race. You have $30 to complete this task.” Go!
Back at GiGi’s, we donned aprons and began to slice 4 cartons of strawberries. We have started a new healing program based on neural retraining and though I found the work difficult at times due to anxiety boiling up and fatigue, I was able to successfully calm my nervous system down again. GiGi took our picture after we finished…
… and wouldn’t you know it, I get caught with the goofy grin when it’s picture time!
Welcome to my poorly photographed Hawaiian lanai – aka my porch!
Good lesson to be learned here – never try for a picture during mid-morning sun. I didn’t even think about the bright sunshine lines when taking the photo, I was just excited to share my garage sale findings this morning. So on with the show!
Here is my lanai at our new apartment. On the other side of the green fabric is the main house’s lania which is used by our landlady, Gigi. It’s mostly a private area with only occasional use of the hose or trimming of the plants by the landlady sending her over this way.
As you can see, it gets a lot of nice sunshine throughout the day. We are currently growing cilantro, dill, and hot peppers – along with a pulmeria tree and several orchids. In the background are banana trees and several other native plants.
But what I really wanted to share is the stuff in the foreground of the photo – today’s garage sale finds. Gosh, these tables are hard to see with all the bright sunshine lines in the background. Anyways! You are looking at 3 tables we found at a yard sale this morning – one end table which oddly is from the same design as a kitchen table/chair set we already had, one folding plastic topped table for Jeremy to use for selling jewelry at the farmer’s market at some point soon, and one sort of coffee table that is exactly the size table we really needed right now.
There is also a three tier wire shelving unit for the kitchen, two nice table lamps with light bulbs included, a small backpack for my camera equipment on beach or hiking trips, and a set of weights to get Jeremy going on regaining his strength after so many years of illness.
You might think to yourself, wow – that’s a lot of stuff, I wonder what they paid for it? I got us a good bargain and love the negotiating part of any garage sale. Twenty dollars, for everything! I really enjoy the days I can feel like we found a good deal.
Maui is fantastic for garage sales. They run year round, every Saturday – usually several dozen on the island. We stick to a 20 minute drive radius most of the time and have found the best bargains at moving sales. When you consider people moving back to the mainland, or even a different island, can’t simply rent a truck and move their belongings – it makes for lots of good condition things at cheap prices! I love it, I really do.
It is now an hour later than in the picture and the clouds have rolled in, making for much better lighting on my lanai. I suppose I could go retake the picture… but who wants to move all those weights back again! Enjoy the sunshine!